Today I'm looking at an abandoned house known in urbex circles as "Granddads House," which leads me to make an additional disclaimer, beyond the usual moral code of no theft, vandalism, forced entry, etc, and that is that I don't pick the names of these places. Some unknown person in the urbex world documented this house and decided that the best possible title to sum it all up was "Granddads House," and somehow it stuck. It is, in my opinion, the second-silliest urbex code name ever. Nothing beats the Village of Bones. That was just one farm house, with no bones. But as far as stupid nicknames go, "Granddads House" is a close second.
Back in 2012 we had the likes of "Red Dress Manor," so named because it had a red dress hanging up in the wardrobe, and "Cloud House," so named because it was on top of a great big hill, literally in the clouds. Then we had "Vanity House," so named apparently because it had dressing tables. So urbex names have always ranged from making a bit of sense to being kinda weird. But seriously, is "Granddads House" the best they could do??? Every abandoned house probably belonged to a grandparent. That's why they're abandoned. The former occupants, to be blunt, are dead. They were old. And just for those who don't know, it's fairly common knowledge that if a hominid wiggly gets to another hominids eggyweg, you get little hominids that then grow up to shoot their wigglys at other eggywegs. It's been happening for millions of years. Shooting his DNA into another person and conjuring forth semen demons is not going to be the former occupants greatest achievement.
Neverthefuckingless, welcome to Granddads House.
It's cute.
Abandoned houses aren't really my favourite locations. If you've been reading my blogs for a while then you'll know I like to find the history of places, and residential locations simply don't have anything to work with. However abandoned houses remain the most popular urbex posts. The mystery appeals to the public, along with the sadness of someones former home being left to rot long after they've passed away. In a way these are essentially memorials to the occupants former lives, and as such it is vitally important that these places be treated with respect. To not respect them is similar to pissing on a gravestone.
On the other hand, abandoned houses also remain the most popular urbex spots because of all the pinchable items. Some urbexers have actually mocked me for allegedly being the only one who doesn't take souvenirs. Granddads House was once pristine, considered a time capsule, until it became well known, subsequently transforming it into the ransacked mess that it is today. That's a bit shit.
I actually spent a good fifteen minutes peeling off stickers that advertised various urbexers social media accounts. They seem to not see the moral issue in a hypothetical, but entirely possible situation where "Granddads" grandchildren get around to clearing out the place, and find it trashed and full of adverts for youtube videos of people breaking in, rummaging around, stealing, trying on the former owners clothes, etc. I guess a lot of the more self-serving urbexers lack that kind of empathy. When my brother came to live with me, he had never heard of urbex, so he looked it up to see what I was always on about, and he said to me "These people want their faces on camera more than they want to show the place that they're visiting." That pretty much sums it up.
The calendar is dated 1993.
The story goes that the titular "Granddad" died in 2010 at the age of 94, which makes me wonder why the urbex scene refer to it as a time capsule. I've been in abandoned places where there is literally nothing younger than the 1980s and it truly feels like stepping back in time. What ancient relics can we uncover from 2010? That's when Toy Story 3 came out. Oooooh!!! Exciting!!!
Here in the lounge, in spite of the mess, it's still possible to get an idea of what this place would have looked like back when "Granddad" and his wife lived here. It would have been quite a nice home back in the day.
Here's a piano with some old sheet music. According to some urbex posts, "Granddad" apparently used to perform for hospital patients. That's pretty wholesome.
With the sofa right next to the piano, it's kinda sweet to imagine his wife sat next to him while he played. I read somewhere that they were together for sixty years before she passed away in 2000. Sixty years is pretty damn impressive. I'm lucky if I can tolerate a human for sixty minutes!
It all seems rather generic as far as abandoned houses go, but then something on the wall caught my eye that would really change my opinion on the place.
Check it out! It's a measuring wall! I'm not sure how common these are today, but traditionally in households, parents would measure their children against the wall each year and mark their growth. I did it, back when my mother was going through her trying-to-actually-be-a-parent phase, and many other households did it, but I'm not sure where the tradition originates. This one is pretty damn vintage!
This is incredible! This is where two young siblings have had their growth marked by their parents during the 1950s! This is the highlight of the house as far as I'm concerned. This is time capsule stuff right here. Russ and Ros also prove that unimaginative naming was associated with this house long before it became abandoned.
Russ and Ros stopped having their height recorded after 1955 but then in 1964 the same handwriting has marked the height of the dog, presumably for a bit of fun. I assume Russ and Ros would have been going through puberty if they were over five feet tall in 1955, so by 1964 they likely would have moved out.
But I am very curious. Why did they decide to measure the dogs height nearly a decade later? And what dog is five foot three inches tall? Why doesn't the dog have a name???
But regardless, this is where the sadness creeps in. Stuff like this drives home the humanity of the place. This was someones family home once. The people who lived here stop being just names on paper, and become actual living people with real stories.
There's a little room behind the lounge, which contains another piano. I have a theory that this might be a converted bedroom, given that the bungalow only has one bedroom but children evidently grew up here.
And now onto the best part of any abandoned building, the toilet.
Still in better condition than the toilets in some pubs and clubs!
And now onto the bedroom...
The bedroom was the most trashed room in the entire place, and also where the majority of urbex stickers were. I peeled them off for a mini bonfire later on, once we'd vacated the premises. Sorry, narcissists, but fuck your feelings.
Someone else had written their urbex channel in the dust on the mirror, so I wiped that off too.
There's an old commode here, indicative that towards the end of his life, "Granddad" had trouble making it to the loo in the night. Poor chap.
Photos around the house indicate that he did have some family. In fact, I learned that the name "Granddads House" actually derives from a bottle of champagne that was found here, addressed "To Granddad" for his ninetieth birthday, from someone called James, also saying "Sorry I couldn't be there to drink it with you." The bottle became the focal point of most urbex posts about Granddads House, being the one thing everyone wanted to get a shot of. So naturally someone smashed it and posted photos of its shattered remains online to brag. Congratulations of being capable of vandalising a dead mans former belongings. Great flex.
This letter is actually addressed to James, opening with "Dear James, we were glad to hear from your dad." But if this was Granddads House, and James didn't live here, why is his letter here? And if it was never sent to him, why was it folded up? It's sad to think that James may not have received the letter.
By far the oddest find in here was Granddads collection of chicken bones. Why wasn't this one named "Chicken Bone House?" That would have made sense! It's a shame Granddad never actually wished on any of these. He could have wished for people to not trash his house after he had passed.
Behind the house, we just have the out-buildings. This is a fairly modern shed.
There's a caravan at the back of the garden. I'm not sure why but I always find these a lot more creepy than actual buildings. They tend to have a more ominous vibe, and pretty foul odours.
There's not much in it, but birds have made a nest on some books, which I find quite comical.
And here appears to be some old schoolwork in impeccable cursive writing. The pages seem to be from a biology book, talkig about the male reproductive system. Isn't it great? It's telling all the urbexers who come here how they too can also increase their chances of someday becoming a granddad.
The other page compares the maternal instincts of birds, fish and mammals.
Lastly there's a boat in the garden, but it's full of water and its usefulness is questionable. I actually think my friend took this photo, because I don't remember snapping the boat. Credit goes to her.
But that about sums up Granddads House.
In conclusion, Granddads House is one of those places that just makes me sad and bitter. It's awful that someone passed away and their home has just been looted and torn to shreds, and decorated with urbex stickers as people who claim to just be documenting places reveal that they are ultimately self-serving weeping cysts on the rectum of humanity. But it is my goal to document, and I'm sure there are others like me who come here for innocent reasons. As easy and tempting as it is to generalise, we must not. Abandoned houses do always make me feel a bit dirty though, especially when the urbex herd has been through. The naming process of abandoned houses, particularly with this one, will forever have me rolling my eyes, but in a world of unrelenting change there is one constant:
Village of Bones will always be a stupider name.
My next blog will be about rooftopping in the city, going up an actual skyscraper, so I'm dead excited about that. And then after that I'm writing about a wedding venue. They will probably be better blogs than this one. In the meantime, to get regular updates about the blog, you can try your luck with the algorithmic hellscapes of social media! I'm active on Instagram, Reddit, Facebook and Twitter. I've also recently gone onto Threads, which is Zuckerbergs Twitter. It's actually alright. I guess a broken clock is right twice a day.
Thank you for reading!
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